As some of you may know I’ve been studying a Masters Degree in Computer Science for the past 6 months.
I’m god-damn 30 now and I have no idea what I’m doing with my life. I don’t even know if my choices are the right choices anymore. I’ve botched my career as a Designer as the initial plan was to re-route my career path towards something more development/techy like Data Analytics/Science or Software Engineering but I wasn’t very sure what direction to go down. This is one of the reasons why I decided to do a Masters.
…now, I’m having second thoughts.
It’s so hard to know what you want in life, what you want to do, whether you’re doing the right thing. During COVID-19 I started to rethink the meaning of career, work and having a job and what do I really want in life? What is it that makes me happy or content? I felt like I was on a constant treadmill with no signs of stopping and no idea of the direction I was going. Therefore I decided to do a little “interview” for myself to sort of talk myself through what I really want in life.
Why did you want a career in development? Like why are you doing a masters?
I wanted to build on technical skills and understand the building blocks of how the internet and computers work. Anyone who knows me knows how much I LOVE my computer and how much I’m on the internet 😂 You could say it’s an addiction…and one that I’m proud of!
Therefore, I’ve always been envious of those around me who had the technical skills to build anything they wanted. I’ve worked in tech for most of my career and I have worked with many crazily awesome people doing really cool stuff to solve real-world problems. I admired their hard skills but I also admired their ability to solve problems.
Despite *wanting* a lot of things during COVID-19 I realised I cared more about independence, creativity and life fulfilment than money and career progression and that I enjoyed doing things that helped others as it was so much more fulfilling than any of the jobs I’ve had. Madhat Girls was a burst of something new in my life that my dear friend Anthea from Uni joined in on and it was one of the craziest and most adventurous 6 months of my “work-life”. I did things I never thought I would do like hold my own webinar in front of over 200 people and organise an art event to collaborate with other creatives… They weren’t amazing things but they were things that made me explore new horizons and all for a good cause.
What would you do if you could do anything you wanted to?
I guess I want to help others using skills I am strong in. Whether to build a product or service to aid mental health or something that helps others improve their mental wellbeing.
Mental wellbeing is a very important goal in my life as it probably is with many others too. I think it’s important we know how to sooth ourselves through life’s ups and downs.
What is more realistic?
Honestly? I want to do so many things but something that I feel is actually attainable is run Training Workshops.
I believe WordPress can build confidence or even help people start-up businesses. With WordPress, you can become a digital entrepreneur. With WordPress, you can blog and set up your own little home in cyberspace. Blogging actually helped me overcome depression as a teenager as it created a hobby to focus on and to grow which boosted my self-esteem and increased my employability in my early 20s. It actually think of it as a saviour to my life.
With WordPress you get to learn new things every day, you get to write and process your thoughts through blogging and you get to do it all for free.
It’s just incredible. I really want to share the benefits of blogging and WordPress with everyone!
Therefore, I was thinking of changing Madhat Girls to provide these workshops but the name doesn’t work for the place I’m in at the moment.
It is a luxury to find work in which you love that is rewarding and in line with your life mission but it isn’t impossible. They say it’s a millennial mindset to want to “work a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life”. But comfort, as found by Maslow, is just meeting our psychological needs; in my opinion, anything beyond that is a bonus.
All we need is love, water, shelter, food and clothing. I have all these things….right? Surely if I meet those needs I am free to spend time as I wish.
My dream work-life is..
Basically, to continue how I’m living now and work towards everything I said above but know that it won’t always turn out as expected.
In the next 5 years, I want to be working in tech AS a technical wizard not as a designer, running website workshops, spend more time volunteering and going to all my fun extracurricular classes.
These are my dream goals and I feel like I’m on my journey there.